MAKING BREAD Celebrates

MOTHERS WHO KNOW BEST—

And the Smart Money Lessons They Taught Us!

Share the Priceless Financial Lessons

YOU Learned from YOUR Mom.

By Gail Harlow

 Flowers, chocolate candy, Hallmark cards. Mothers everywhere get sweet symbols of their children’s love on Mother’s Day. We thank our mothers for having us, for keeping us safe, for teaching us how to cook, to drive, to study, to laugh and to love, to be CEO’s and soccer moms. Of all the “family values” mothers teach their children, perhaps the most important is the value of money. Directly or indirectly, through family money arguments overheard, coupons clipped or spending sprees indulged in, children acquire their own financial personality in the company of their mothers.

            In honor of all the Mothers Who Know Best out there, a couple of years ago MAKING BREAD asked readers to share with us “the most valuable money lesson your mother taught you about saving and spending, or the things money can and can’t buy.” The answers we received were honest, heartfelt and revealing of smart lessons learned. Women who answered our survey know that having money means having freedom from worry and freedom of choice.

Below, is a representative sample of the responses we received. Share your favorite money lessons learned from mom with us by e-mailing editor@makingbreadmagazine.com (subject line: Money Lessons from Mom). The top three responses chosen by our staff will appear in the next issue of MAKING BREAD, and the authors will be given a copy of “Making Bread: The Ultimate Financial Guide for Women Who Need Dough.”

Thanks, Mom!

            “My mother taught me that every woman should have her own income,” says Sharon Sorokin James.  “I can still remember, in the 1960s, there were times when my mother wanted to spend money on something (for example, sending her godson on a summer trip that his parents couldn't afford) that my father, for all his generosity, did not want to do.  My mother would serenely respond, ‘That's okay, I'll just use my own money for it.’  And she did. My mother had been taught by her mother (who, in the early 1900s had to drop out of high school to care for her five younger brothers after their mother died), that every woman should have a profession.  And I plan to teach my daughter the same lessons, with an additional emphasis on the fact that the profession, or career, or job, or whatever you want to call it, should be something that she has a passion for.  Of course, at the age of 6, my daughter has already decided to be an "architect or artist," and although I know she is not likely to become a wealthy woman in those fields, I encourage her to follow her dreams. I know she will always be able to support herself.”

            Trudy Graboyes writes:  “My mother always taught me not to spend money needlessly. I suppose she was a bit of a ‘tightwad,’ because she was a ‘Depression’ baby—not a depressing baby, just a baby of the Depression era. It was tough growing up with this type of mother when my sisters and I thought it ever so important to buy expensive makeup. Good thing my Dad was a cosmetic chemist for Love cosmetics, and we got the makeup for free! This kept peace in the family—and how cool was it that we could say my Dad, 'made love'!

            Along the same lines, Nancy Simon adds, “If you can't pay cash, don't buy it.  (Charging it is fine as long as you pay off your balance in full each month.)  Since I was an adolescent, that lesson has saved me from frittering away mucho dineros on impulse items.”

             Then there’s the woman who admits, “My mother taught me indirectly not to let the lack of money stop you from enjoying life. She cared too much about appearances, and when she was a widow and didn’t have money for a new wardrobe that would make her feel well-dressed, she stopped herself from taking a trip to see old friends and new places. Those concerns aren’t important in the end. I learned from her that experiences, not appearance, are what count.”

            Deatra Owens, an apparently savvy and practical businesswoman, shares this tip: “Never ask for anything for free, because one day you will be in business and will need as much income as you can get to stay afloat. So always pay, and expect the same from your friends and associates.”

            “My mother taught me that it is quality and not quantity that is important.  Fewer fine things are better than a lot of junk,” says Marilynn  Dickinson.

            The only man to answer our survey contributed this bit of wisdom: “My mother used to prod me to do better in school by asking me if I didn't want to live in the way to which I was accustomed?  The lesson was: if you don't do well in school, your life style will suffer accordingly.  I'm afraid I never took this as seriously as I should.  I always liked the advice [humorist] Jean Shepherd's mom gave him.  As I recall, he had asked her a philosophical question like "...what is the meaning of life?" She was in her chenille bathrobe, making the meatloaf and red cabbage, and she replied,  ‘Put money in your pocket.’  Profound!”

            Perhaps the most touching and wise submission came from Dianna Ballew, who wrote: “My mother taught me that I can do anything that I put my mind to if I am well-prepared when the opportunity comes along, and that trust and friendship make you the richest person in the world."

            Finally, there’s the woman who shared this: “As to my mother's tutelage regarding money, all she ever said were these two things: 1. ‘Tell your father he owes me back child support,’ and 2.  ‘Here's $50 for your new life in New York.  I expect this back’.”

            We happen to know she repaid the debt.

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 Gail Harlow is the Founding Editor of MAKING BREAD. Honor your mother by e-mailing editor@makingbreadmagazine.com (subject line: Money Lessons from Mom) to share with MAKING BREAD readers the money lessons your mother taught you. We'll feature your responses in the "Fresh Bread Money Blog."

E-mail this article.

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